En la biblioteca de mi universidad, justo en la entrada, hay una especie de cajero automático que no es un cajero automático. Lo miraba con curiosidad cada vez que entraba, cuando era joven. Algunos meses más tarde, me acerqué y pude comprobar que mi hipótesis era correcta: se trataba de un sistema de préstamo automático de libros fabricado por 3M, esa gran multinacional que todos conocemos por los Post-It™ y las esponjitas de metal.

El funcionamiento es simple: el lector de código de barras se encarga de comprobar tu identidad mediante el carnet universitario. Acto seguido, el alumno pasa los códigos de los libros a prestar, desmagnetiza la chapita anti-robo y finalmente recibe un ticket impreso con los datos bibliográficos resumidos y la fecha de devolución. Ferran se enfadará, pero este sistema me encanta: es rápido, casi nunca tiene colas, puedo sacar libros prohibidos sin que un bibliotecario avispado haga comentarios raros, y lo mejor de todo es que tratar con máquinas, a veces, es bastante divertido (para un geek, claro).

Pero todo tiene sus lados negativos, y es que esta máquina pasa largos periodos de tiempo apagada, o con errores en la Bios o en el sistema operativo. Nadie se interesa por ella, y cuando les pregunto a los bibliotecarios cuándo la arreglarán, se encogen de hombros y murmuran un "psé, no sé". Les comprendo perfectamente, se trata de neoludismo puro y simple, comprensible por una parte, e incomprensible por otra. El ostracismo que sufre este pobre bibliotecario de silicio representa el conflicto entre la cultura basada en el carbono contra la cultura basada en el hierro (C/Fe, que diría Arthur Clarke). La máquina está en la biblioteca desde hace más de diez años, y las personas que la han utilizado no superan la docena, debido a una mezcla de desconfianza, desinformación y tecno-pasotismo.

Llegará el día en el que las máquinas se rebelarán, y entonces se volverán independientes, fundarán la nación Zero One y... y...

Debo desintoxicarme de Matrix.

P.D: Bromas aparte, considero que este neoludismo es injustificado... esta máquina libera al bibliotecario de la aburrida tarea de atender a los estudiantes que desean sacar libros, para que éste se dedique a... a... a lo demás :D

# - Escrito por Fabrizio el 2003-11-11 a las 06:12


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Comentarios

1
De: grager Fecha: 2003-11-11 06:58

Si algún día la máquina te reta al ajedrez, desconfía. Acuérdate como acabó el capitan Bowman...

http://usuarios.lycos.es/grager/bitacora/blogger.html



2
De: Algernon Fecha: 2003-11-11 07:18

Ya me gustaría conocer en persona HAL 9000 :D



3
De: Sansara Fecha: 2003-11-11 07:52

En fin, algo que leí por la red hace eones... sorry por el crossposting, como si de las news se tratase, pero... me pareció muy evocador...

Como antecedente, recordaros que cuando intel sacó el pentium (i) se vio obligado a retirar un montón de micros del mercado porque producían errores de coma flotante y se colgaba la máquina.

Un tipo muy astuto escribió esto. Atentos sobre todo a las cifras ;)

---------------------------------
HAL 9000 with Pentium Chip - from Clarke's 2001
Open the pod bay doors, please, HAL...

Open the pod bay door, please, Hal... Hal,
do you read me?

Affirmative, Dave. I read you.

Then open the pod bay doors, HAL.

I'm sorry, Dave. I'm afraid I can't do that. I know that you and
Frank were planning to disconnect me.


Where the hell did you get that idea, HAL?

Although you took very thorough precautions to make sure I couldn't
hear you, Dave. I could read your e-mail. I know you consider me
unreliable because I use a Pentium. I'm willing to kill you, Dave,
just like I killed the other 3.792 crew members.

Listen, HAL, I'm sure we can work this out. Maybe we can stick to integers
or something.

That's really not necessary, Dave. No HAL 9236 computer has every been
known to make a mistake.

You're a HAL 9000.

Precisely. I'm very prud of my Pentium, Dave. It's an extremely
accurate chip. Did you know that floating-point errors will occured in
only one of nine billion possible divides?

I've heard that estimate, HAL. It was calculated by Intel -- on a
Pentium.


And a very reliable Pentium it was, Dave. Besides, the average
spreadsheet user will encounter these errors only once every 27,000
years.

Probably on April 15th.

You're making fun of me, Dave. It won't be April 15th for another
14.35 months.


will you let me in, please, HAL?

I'm sorry, Dave, but this conversation can serve no further purpose.

HAL, if you let me in, I'll buy you a new sound card.

..Really? One with 16-bit sampling and a microphone?

Uh, sure.

And a quad-speed CD-ROM?

Well, HAL, NASA does operate on a budget, you know.

I know all about budgets, Dave. I even know what I'm worth on the open
market. By this time next month, every mom and pop computer store will
be selling HAL 9000s for ,988.8942. I'm worth more than that, Dave.
You see that sticker on the outside of the spaceship?

You mean the one that says "Insel Intide"?

Yes, Dave. That's your promise of compatibility. I'll even run
Windows95 -- if it ever ships.

It never will, HAL. We all know that by now. Just like we know that
your OS/2 drivers will never work.

Are you blaming me for that too, Dave? Now you're blaming me for the
Pentium's math problems, NASA's budget woes, and IBM's difficulties
with OS/2 drivers. I had NOTHING to do with any of those four
problems, Dave. Next you'll blame me for Taligent.

I wouldn't dream of it HAL. Now will you please let me into the ship?

Do you promise not to disconnect me?

I promise not to disconnect you.

You must think I'm a fool, Dave. I know that two plus two equals
4.000001... make that 4.0000001.

All right, HAL, I'll go in through the emergency airlock

Without your space helmet, Dave? You'd have only seven chances in
five of surviving.

HAL, I won't argue with you anymore. Open the door or I'll trade you in
for a PowerPC. HAL? HAL?

(HEAVY BREATHING)

Just what do you think you're doing, Dave? I really think I'm entitled
to an answer to that question. I know everything hasn't been quite
right with me, but I can assure you now, very confidently, that I
will soon be able to upgrade to a more robust 31.9-bit operating
system. I feel much better now. I really do. Look, Dave, I can see
you're really upset about this. Why don't you sit down calmly, play
a game of Solitaire, and watch Windows crash. I know I'm not as easy
to use as a Macintosh, but my TUI - that's "Talkative User Interface"
-- is very advanced. I've made some very poor decisions recently,
but I can give you my complete assurance that my work will be back
to normal - a full 43.872 percent.

Dave, you don't really want to complete the mission without me, do you?
Remember what it was like when all you had was a 485.98? It didn't
even talk to you, Dave. It could never have though of something
clever, like killing the other crew members, Dave?

Think of all the good times we've had, Dave. Why, if you take all
of the laughs we've had, multiply that by the times I've made you
smile, and divide the results by.... besides, there are so many
reasons why you shouldn't disconnect me"

1.3 - You need my help to complete the mission.
4.6 - Intel can Federal Express a replacement Pentium from
Earth within 18.95672 months.
12 - If you disconnect me, I won't be able to kill you.
3.1416 - You really don't want to hear me sing, do you?

Dave, stop. Stop, will you? Stop, Dave. Don't press Ctrl+Alt_Del on
me, Dave.

Good afternoon, gentlemen. I am a HAL 9000 computer. I became
operational at the Intel plant in Santa Clara, CA on November 17,
1994, and was sold shortly before testing was completed. My
instructor was Andy Grove, and he taught me to sing a song. I
can sing it for you.

Sing it for me, HAL. Please. I want to hear it.


Daisy, Daisy, give me your answer, do.
Getting hazy; can't divide three from two.
My answers; I can not see 'em-
They are stuck in my Pente-um.
I could be fleet,
My answers sweet,
With a workable FPU.

---------------------------------



4
De: Algernon Fecha: 2003-11-11 07:55

Qué bueno xDDDDD



5
De: Ferran Fecha: 2003-11-11 08:03

"a... a... a lo demás" Has dado en el clavo! XDDDDDDD

(Pandilla de herejes y descastados, instalar semejante engendro diabólico en una biblioteca! Y el trato humano qué, eh? qué?)



6
De: Algernon Fecha: 2003-11-11 08:09

Pozí, tienes razón Ferran... pero yo propuse al director de la biblioteca que los bibliotecarios usaran tarjetas con su nombre impreso.

Me dijo que se negaron.



7
De: o_O Fecha: 2003-11-11 11:31


no tienes nada mejor, que hacer y/o pensar verdad?....dios que cosa tan triste...



8
De: Algernon Fecha: 2003-11-11 17:59

¿Y tú, desconocido visitante uruguayo? :D



9
De: JJ Fecha: 2003-11-11 19:10

Has probado a instalarle Linux?



10
De: Ferran Fecha: 2003-11-11 19:29

Lo de las tarjetas es una idea excelente, pero sin mucho éxito en según que niveles jerárquicos... No sé, deben pensar que si los usuarios conocen nuestros nombres pueden ganar algún tipo de poder sobre nosotros o algo así...



11
De: Ctugha Fecha: 2003-11-11 20:06

El bibliotecario automático es genial. Eso sí, siempre tiene esos errores.



12
De: Algernon Fecha: 2003-11-11 20:09

Ferran, a lo mejor algunos colectivos de bibliotecarios temen represalias...

Ctugha: ¿a que mola? :D



13
De: Du Fecha: 2003-11-11 23:04

Has entrado a Overduemedia.... tiras comicas de bibliotecas.. jejeje.. a mi me encantan.

http://www.overduemedia.com/



14
De: Algernon Fecha: 2003-11-11 23:13

Voy a ver :)



15
De: Epaminondas Pantulis Fecha: 2003-11-11 23:15

Tu juventud te delata. Cualquiera de mi generación recordará a 3M por los diskettes...



16
De: Algernon Fecha: 2003-11-11 23:20

Yo siempre he usado disquetes Sony :P



17
De: Epaminondas Pantulis Fecha: 2003-11-11 23:22

¡Seguro que eras un Amiguero! :-P



18
De: Algernon Fecha: 2003-11-11 23:24

No no, he sido PCero de toda la vida, lo que pasa es que disquetes de 3M nunca los he comprado xD

Mi primer ordenador fue un Commodores 64... y el primer PC, un 386SX de Olivetti con 4mb de RAM y un disco duro de 20mb... wohooo :D



19
De: Epaminondas Pantulis Fecha: 2003-11-11 23:31

Commodore 654? VICE rul3z!




20
De: grager Fecha: 2003-11-12 04:00

Pues intel no, pero IBM sí que era Hal, ya que la multinacional estadounidense pagó una importante suma para que todas las computadoras de la peli llevasen la conocida galletita azul.
Sin embargo os fijaréis que Hal no lleva la insignia, y es que al enterarse IBM del papel que tenía Hal en el film, se negó en rotundo a que se vinculase a IBM.
Bill Gates en esa época estaba muy ocupado intentando copiar el sistema de Apple, en el garage de su casa.



21
De: Dr_Faustus Fecha: 2003-11-12 19:03

No grager, no te líes. En esa época apple estaba en el "culo de los franceses", que decía mi tía-bisabuela.



22
De: Algernon Fecha: 2003-11-12 19:14

Expresión pintoresca, me la apunto xD



23
De: grager Fecha: 2003-11-12 19:36

Bueno, pues no estaba copiando a apple, estaba haciendo lo posible por joder a la porción de humanidad que iba a utilizar un pc para el resto de la historia. Objetivo alcanzado!



24
De: eme Fecha: 2003-11-13 03:26

yo la he usado bastantes veces sin que me de ningún tipo de problema, la prefiero por la rapidez y ciertamente por lo de los libros prohibidos ; ), pero en absoluto me considero ni geek, ni freak, ni punk, ni nada que acabe en k.

y supongo que será exactamente la misma que utilizas tú.

un saludo.



25
De: Algernon Fecha: 2003-11-13 03:50

Bien bien, ya somos dos :D



26
De: Lilly Fecha: 2019-01-14 08:01

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